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First Father/Son Bike Ride

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Embarked on my first-ever father/son bike ride with the Bug yesterday. We took a leisurely trip around the Back Bay (here in Newport Beach), a popular path where few cars travel. Gorgeous day, too.

Father Son Bike RideHis little bike still has training wheels. A bigger one* sits waiting in the garage, but he refuses to ride anything without training wheels. (* Miss Julie picked it up for him in Laguna last month.)

I'm in decent shape .. seeing I've been biking everywhere .. since my license was suspended in June. So my legs feel strong.

The Back Bay loop is 10 miles. So I expected the Bug to be tired afterwards. Surprised me when he insisted on hitting the trampoline soon as we returned.

Used to be I could tire him with a full day of outdoor activity. That doesn't seem to be working so well anymore. Ever since he turned 4 .. he's become impervious. I'm the one who usually tires first.

Speaking of tiring .. last night I slept better than I have in months. Been dragging all day today .. even after a triple-espresso this morning. I made some puttanesca for lunch today. That usually helps. (Carb-loading.)

The loop is mostly flat but has one big down-hill. Made me smile to hear him yelling, "Woo-hoo!" all the way. "That was cool, dad!"

Many have suggested Evelyn, as a movie I should watch. It's based on a true story, and stars Pierce Brosnan (ex-007) as a father who (in Ireland in the 50's) was ordered by the court to place his 3 children in Catholic-run orphanages .. after his wife ran off with another man (to Australia).

Evelyn, starring Pierce Brosnan as Desmond DolyeEvelyn is the name of the oldest child (pictured holding her on the cover), whose testimony before the Irish Supreme Court proves decisive.

Normally I'd rather stick needles in my eyes than watch something like this. But I was feeling my oats last night. (Irish oats, that is.)

In the end, Pierce (who plays Desmond Doyle and sports a fine Irish accent) along with his band of rag-tag lawyers take their case to the Irish Supreme Court, where they challenge the constitution itself (something about it being 'repugnant').

I had to pause the DVD a few times, to take a breather, such as when one of the nuns beats little Evelyn so hard her face turns black and blue. (Almost couldn't finish watching.)

The New York Times seems to agree, by saying » "There's little that's quite so shocking as seeing a child beaten in a movie."

But backing up a bit, I must be missing something basic about the story. To be specific, I can't understand why the state/courts seem to conspire with the Catholic church to keep the kids in the orphanages, away from their dad, even after he satisfies all their requests (gets a good job, gives up beer for lemonade, etc.).

Here's the legal glitch » the law contains a stipulation that says BOTH parents must consent before the kids can be removed from the orphanage. But the wife has run off to Australia (the day after Christmas), and not even her parents can find her.

But here's what I don't get » If the wife is MIA, that (alone) shouldn't stop the court and the Church from returning the kids to their dad. I mean, I'm just using basic common sense here. Yet it does (stop them).

Nor can I see any reason why the church and state wouldn't want to do everything within their (considerable) power to reunite the kids with their dad .. especially when they all want to live together.

No Desire to Rule the World

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There's a scene in The Gladiator (Best Picture, 2000) where Marcus Aurelius (Roman Emperor, 160-180 A.D.) shares with Maximus (his General) that he's dying, and tells him he wants Maximus to replace him and lead Rome after his death.

Marcus Aurelius | Roman Emperor 161-180 A.D.

"I want you to become protector of Rome after I die .. to give power back to the people, and end the corruption that has crippled it. [long pause] Would you accept this great honor I have offered you?"

Maximus responds: "With all my heart, no."

The ancient emperor grabs Maximus by the head and implores, "That is why it must be you!"

The implication here is that the very desire for this power (» ruler of the most powerful empire on the planet) disqualifies one for the job. (A political catch-22, if you will.)

Indeed, it has been my experience, working in large organizations, that people who crave power the most tend to suk the worst at exercising authority.

Maximus for President!

Realize I'm making coarse generalizations, but certainly, anyone who wants to be president (or even a senator) would've long since passed the threshold of any power-craving test we could concoct.

I see less of a problem however, with the people themselves than with the system that puts them there. Most agree our current system of government does not attract the best and brightest minds our nation has to offer.

Along these lines .. I must ask » what is it that drives a person to desire such lofty positions of authority? .. especiallly when approval ratings sit at all-time lows, and few trust a politician to do what he/she says. And does mere presence of this desire prognosticate anything (as Marcus implies) about the likelihood of their becoming a noble, effective leader?

Marlon Brando as Colonel Kurtz in Apocalypse NowA quote from General Corman in Apocalypse Now:

There's a conflict in every human heart, between the rational and the irrational, between good and evil. And good does not always triumph. Sometimes, the dark side overcomes what Lincoln called 'the better angels of our nature.'

Every man has a breaking point. You and I have. Walt Kurtz has reached his. And very obviously, he has gone insane.

That quote refers to a man reaching his mental breaking point. I've reached a different breaking point: my heart is broken.

You can't die of a broken heart. (Or so they say.) Psalm 147 says: "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." So it would seem, there is hope.

Regarding the film (which I've seen several times over the years), I've never considered what it was that supposedly made Kurtz go crazy .. until now.

I mean, they paint him (played by Marlon Brando) as a stud, both mentally and physically. But if you watch the film, I think you'll agree the thing that made him snap was .. being subject to a dysfunctional system.

Finally finished watching All the King's Men last night. Near the end, Jude Law performs the following voiceover (while playing solitaire). He speaks quietly, solemnly:

Jue Law in All the King's Men"After any great trauma, or crisis, after the shock subsides and the nerves stop twitching, you settle down to the new condition of things, because you know that all possibility of any more change has been used up.

You've seen the pattern finally, because you've stepped back far enough to take in the whole picture."

He gets up and walks to the window, where outside it's pouring rain. The voiceover continues as the sound of rain becomes prominent.

"But it's too late now .. to do anything except accommodate yourself to it. And that's it. There's nothing left to do, or say, except that God and nothing have a lot in common. The end."

Broken, Defeated, Dazed & Confused

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Imagine a man you've never met, walks up and proceeds to (methodically) mount a bazooka on a tripod right in front of you, and then carefully aims the crosshairs at your heart before squeezing the trigger ..

Cannon.. and you have an idea of how I feel. Defeated, broken. Hollow. Dazed & confused (literally). Not good. It's not the end of the world. (Only feels like it.)

I watched a little of All the King's Men last night, before bed. One scene stood out (as if it were speaking to me), where Sean Penn is devastated by an injustice, while trying to do the right thing, and a man asks him, "What are you gonna do?"

And he answers (unsteadily, as if he's trying to talk himself into it), "I'm gonna keep the faith." Today I know that unsteady feeling.

There is definitely a temptation to "give up" .. to stop caring (because it hurts too much & all hope seems lost). But I don't think I am capable of that.

Changed the font used for headings on the home page .. to Trebuchet MS, known for its modern, artsy style. (You like?) Before this, I was using Courier New, which seemed more computer techie-ish (which I also like).

Genghis KhanThis Font is Trebuchet MS

A better example of black text on white background can be found » HERE (VPS guide).

This Font is Courier New

Courier New is a mono-spaced font, which tends to consume more space (per character), forcing me to use shorter headings/titles (.. tho not necessarily a bad thing).

Regarding the text used on the home page, I still use Verdana, which can't be beat (I feel) for pure readability. Many times, I've tried to replace Verdana, but could never find another screen-font as easy to read.

Ye Olde Rad Blog II uses Trebuchet MS as its normal-text font. Not as readable, if you ask me.

On a more personal note, I am in the middle of "stuff." (Which is why I'm lagging on entries.) The kind of stuff you find wading thru a swamp infested with hungry crocodiles. (A particularly toothy one is chewing on my butt right now. Munch-munch.)

Chris McCandless - Into the WildWatched Into the Wild last night. Read the book last year. Tho I missed the film when it hit theaters last autumn. Had to wait for the DVD release.

I was impressed. Much better than I expected. (And I expected much.) Obviously a labor of love for Sean Penn, who directed and also wrote the screenplay. Easily one of my top-10 films of all-time.

Most noticeable were the film's artistic touches. I must've said, "Wow, look at that shot!" a dozen times. (Composition.)

The (true) story provokes much discussion, and evokes different feelings in different people.

To me, it's about rejecting the damage caused by people who are supposed to love us (more than anybody else), and care for us, even when we can't care for ourselves (parents)...

.. by rejecting their values, especially those they hold most dear .. which, (in the case of Chris McCandless) were » money and "things".

The trailer contains a restaurant-scene where Chris' dad offers to buy him a new car .. following his graduation from college (with honors) .. to which he replies, "Why would I want a new car? The Datsun runs fine .. I don't want *things,* dad."

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